Two Weirds Make A Right

What You Crave vs What You Need

  • Chocolate: Raw nuts/seeds.
  • Oily/Fatty Snacks: Kale, leafy greens.
  • Soda/Carbonated Drinks: Actual, literal bubbles.
  • Chips/Salty Food: Topsoil.
  • Cookies: Freudian psychology.
  • Sweet Tea: A strong Southern gentleman to take care of you.
  • Pasta/Carbs: Pasta/Carbs.
  • Ice: The sweet release of death.

I want a high-power job where i get to where expensive silk pantyhose and all of my colleagues are afraid i’ll puncture their throat with my stiletto

austincarl1le:

do you ever get in one of those moods where you’re like feeling okay but you’re really sad at the same time and you just want to talk to someone and make them hug you but you feel annoying so you kind of just sit there being really sad

(via kawaiielectrickush)

enattendantlesoleil:

me during classes

  • "that’s racist"
  • "that’s sexist"
  • "there are more than two genders"
  • "ok but could we maybe not use that word"
  • "that’s ableist"
  • "there aren’t enough girls in here"

(via blackmormon)